突然了解

为什么人家说上大学的时候是最快乐的。

因为：

1。想做什么就做什么。
2。没有人会说你不积极上进，那个每天不上课的家伙还不是一样安稳毕业。
3。有一次我睡到十一点起来，没有人说我，我也竟然没有愧疚感。如果在家里的话是一种非常不可思议的事情。
4。喜欢做什么就有什么机会。真的机会特别多。
5。明明只是一点点小小的成就，大家会把你当神。在家里我永远是虫。
6。可以自己定扫地，洗衣，洗碗的时间。
7。伙食份量少/不好吃，可以减肥。（其实也是坏处）
8。永远有人陪说话。回到家里就只是对着电脑。说多一点就让人嫌吵。

------------------------------------------------------------------
不是说在家里不快乐。现在的我应该是很快乐的。
不愁三餐，又可以去旅行，什么都有人当靠山，不愁钱。
但是没有成就感。什么都不是我的功劳。特别寂寞。

明明我是一个很幸福的人。我在烦恼什么？

没有一样东西是我的，房里的抽屉妈妈随时能打开。我觉得特别没有隐私。
我的摆设我妈可以随意乱动，因为打扫是他做的。
有时很想发狂对他说可不可以不要管我就让我自己去打扫吧。我要住在猪窝里是我的权利。
但这样的话要我怎样说出口。房子是妈妈的，我身上用的穿的那一样不是他的。
我有权利发脾气吗？


总觉得家里很多小事一点一点地让我快要发狂。
-----------------------------------------------------------------

有时觉得老爸这样栽培我，到最后我也不是个小小公司里的小职员。
真是很逊。

Uneasy (RANT)

Well... getting job offer, buying a new car and going Taiwan. Everything crushed into this very very small and short week...

I really feel depress when I come home. No kidding. I feel so trapped here and there is so much obligation.
Gone is the day I can just mind my own business and do what I want at the time I see fit.
Everything have to be done by my parents way. That's a bit sickening.
I know talking like this is ungrateful. But man, I am like 24 now? Gosh, give me some freedom...

Anyhow, this is just rant. RANT RANT RANT.

And I actually hate working so soon. The heck I need to squeeze damn lot of thing in this short period.
Some more getting a dead end job. I am so damn sure I am going to run away as soon as possible.
But looking on the bright side, my manager is actually a very nice person... :D Just need to stay away from the regional manager, too much big words and small action.

Coming back to JB then I'll be working 2 jobs, literally. Hardly any personal leisure time for me. Sigh. But what to do. It is time to contribute...

Anyways, I should go pack now = X =

Yes, you'll be fine...

毕业感言

我，应该算是毕业了吧？

(在圣陶沙骑脚车，虽然脱队但其实还蛮开心的）

同班同学答应一起去新加坡旅行，也去了。中途种种事件让我有点emo。
其实也没有什么，问题还是老问题。
我们本来就是不同的人，被逼迫地凑在一起，还很不幸的要扮演恩爱的一家。
其实我一直都不太在这个团队里，多我不多，少我不少。

经历过了种种事件，四年的感情，在离别的时候为什么我并没有伤感的感觉，只是松了一口气呢？也许在这里没有一个和我非常契合的人。在这四年里，我一直觉得就算在同学中，我都是孤单的。勉勉强强地维持了四年，分手的时候居然有解脱的感觉。
和同学个人的时候都还好，但是到了那个大团体的时候，还是会觉得很不自在。

夜景好漂漂亮

但是很庆幸，在宿舍找到很棒的室友，也有很照顾我的同学（谢谢你哦hocky）。
还有很多很对味的好朋友，学长学姐学弟学妹之类等等的。真正的不舍是从那里来的。
在我有难关的时候是你们伸出援手，是你们照顾我。每天吃饭的那种快乐等等……


还有一直都在我身边的咩咩。我真的很庆幸一路有你的陪伴。
现在离开了你，真的觉得很孤单。但是我会好好照顾自己的！

就是这样吧？
毕业后很多东西接踵而来，很忙。
有时我觉得我不能够应付这些。
很神奇的，之前我祷告，我所担心的事情，全部自己解决了。
工作自动找上门来，平时很贵的行李箱刚好大减价所以可以用超低价买到好料，连衣服都乘大减价买了……
感谢主，真的是太神奇了。当我祷告后，我所想的，所要的，统统自己实现了。
希望接下来会顺顺利利……

Lesson taught by couple seat

Honestly, couple seat is TOTALLY over-rated.

Normally Meh and I are sane enough to avoid these  extra costs  couple-trap. Since student pass give you a good RM5 discount, and the film is the same anyway, we just never tried couple seat. But being me, I always rant on wanting to try it with him. Then on Sunday, we just finally went crazy and say: 'Yes! We wanna try out couple seats!'

OK, I am at the wrong side to actually have expectation about a seat. I was expecting a seat that at least allow him to put an arm over me, but nope, not feasible. The seat is so hard and straight on the back. The only difference is the absence of the place u put your arms. I tried lean over onto his shoulder, nope, bad posture = aching everywhere. Finally I sighed (and I feel the disappointment from Meh also) and be contented to just warm my hand on his belly, over his jacket, your pervs. I suspect this non-cuddle-able design is specially requested by the cinema so the lovebirds wouldn't advance from huggle to something else.

So we finally conclude that couple seat is worse than our most cheapskate date and it is more expensive! Cheapskate date normally equals to watching downloaded movie on his computer (cuddling or not depends), some food, comments on the movie midway etc. So I started to become skeptical about all the myth on couple-quest. Like you've got to have a diamond ring, or getting expensive gifts on Valentine's.

And at the end of the movie, Meh and I looked at each other and literally laugh out loud for our stupidity.

Cheers to disappointments in life.

It's raining

It's raining and I'm tired of staring at the computer screen.
oh dearest why can't you come over and hug me?

------------------------------------------------------------

aha, I was being lyrical. So tired these few days... I only really want a good hug from you darling. I realized that Platonic love isn't for me. I prefer physical touch and warmth from my lover. Cuddling is the best invention even before slice bread. Of course I wasn't saying the spiritual part should be absent. Mark Zuckenberg is married yesterday. I really envy them. That was some sort of my dream actually. Two person, working hard for themselves, then got married and walk the journey together. His girlfriend looks like a smart girl, with her own career. It's rare to see millionaire with a partner that doesn't look like movie stars. Maybe I was touch by the pair because they act like really normal people (because they are?). Honestly, looking at them makes me wanna get married. LOL.

Talk about recent things. Life was busy. And i have a lot of things due tomorrow. I feel like a walking zombie now (right, sitting zombie. Haven't move this butt for a week). Somehow I just feel sick to do all the project papers, assignments, thesis. I just want a relax weekend with someone I love. Friends, family or boyfriend. Actually boyfriend is better, oops.  But weekend with friends are great too.

I miss my friends, and my family. And I miss my boyfriend physically.

Come on, go finish your assignments. Come here, give you some self-hugs. Cheer up darling, you just need to hang on for a bit more. Tiny bit more, Ok? Pat pats.

......smiles





Don't know what I am talking about, actually, brain is like glue after weeks of thesis.

关于水果

1。从前有个人，喜欢每天吃不同的水果。但他每个水果都只咬一二口就不吃了，他说厌烦了就可以丢掉。突然有一天，他惊觉浪费水果是不好的事情，于是开始尝试把水果吃完。第一第二口很甜很好吃，再咬多几口就觉得有点太甜腻了，再咬一口就只觉得酸涩，吃到最后只感觉到皮的苦涩。最后的记忆最鲜明，于是他开始怀疑水果都是苦的。




2。又有一个人，也是喜欢吃水果的。但是他觉得世界上的水果都不够好。于是他在丛林中找寻他心目中的水果之王。香的嫌不甜，又香又甜的又满身刺，又香又甜又没刺的是别人家里万般珍爱栽种的特异品种。所以到最后，他什么水果都吃不到。




3。这第三个人，吃水果喜欢开水果宴大家一起吃，图那你争我夺的快感。但有时抢香蕉抢得急了，又抢得满脸伤。吃完后还踩到香蕉皮绊倒，落得被宴席上的人取笑。




4。这个人，只喜欢吃橙。他买橙，剥皮，吃橙。




故事完了

城市

有没有试过突然发现一首你很喜欢的歌，然后一整天就只听着那首歌。
今天听着苏打绿的《无与伦比的美丽》的时候，发现了《城市》这首歌。
很喜欢它那种小调的感觉。非常非常贴切的一首歌。
听着的时候脑海里就蹦出一座阴阴暗暗的城市，不停地下着梅雨，汽车什么的堵在一起。
行人匆匆忙忙地走在路上，象上了发条的机器。

歌词也很有意思

城市 

作詞：青峰
作曲：青峰

這座城市一般
讓你在夢中不停的衰老
人像落葉一般
冬天的空中冰冷的容貌

城市面目猙獰 駕著光速奔跑
我們是沉默機器 對照著時間表
我們就像溫室的花朵
麻木的心 刷白的瞳孔
彩色的臉 混亂的慾望和顫抖
現在是謠言侵略事實的時代
必須偷看哪個誰是不是在偷看

這座城市一般
享受著奢侈卻莫名失落
人像稀釋一般
在鬧區列車上逐漸沉默

我們囚禁在格林威治的規則裡
在數位的銀色浪花中喘不過氣

我們就像溫室的花朵
麻木的心 刷白的瞳孔
彩色的臉 混亂的慾望和顫抖
現在是現在侵略過去的時代
必須悲哀快樂所帶來的更悲哀

這座城市裡面
試著讓自己沒有那麼糟
人像落葉迎面
在一座ㄧ座孤獨島中間
我微笑